I am able to exercise and move more freely than I have since I was twenty-something and I have a profound new sense of peace with my past.
While my body has undergone a remarkable transformation and tremendous relief from pain, it’s the emotional healing that I experienced that’s been most powerful and significant. Very deep and personal healing took place during my sessions which has allowed me to make peace with my father posthumously – something I’ve struggled with, not for years, but for decades.
I rarely tell people I’ve been “Rolfed”. It may be because I’m afraid no one will believe the transformative effect this therapy has had on my body – and life. I do know that I don’t quite know how to put into words the remarkable thing that rolfing is. I will share my experience and you can be the judge of whether it seems too fantastical – or not.
I first learned about Rolfing as a teen, some thirty years ago. I was fascinated by the idea that our bodies as well as our minds hold onto traumatic experiences. And I was equally intrigued with the idea that healing from these traumas might take a physical form. While psychotherapy and, later, cognitive behavioral therapy have been widely embraced as legitimate therapy for trauma, a physical approach to healing trauma has been largely overlooked.
For many years, the notion of experiencing the healing powers of Rolfing remained a seed of thought in my mind. Then in 2005, I discovered that an acquaintance – Stephanie Stolte – was a certified Rolfer. Finally, after more than thirty years of waiting I had an opportunity to experience this form of healing therapy. I remember my first thought being: “will it hurt?” A ridiculous question, I now realize. In fact, I actually fell asleep during one session!
When I began my ten-session program, I knew that my body needed work badly. I’d done ballet as a child and teen, pushing my joints – feet, ankles, knees and hips – far beyond their natural range and more recently had undergone radiation therapy for cancer. I’d had chronic lower back pain for years and arthritic-type pain from my hips to my toes for as long as I could remember. I wasn’t thinking about the years of emotional trauma I’d experienced – abandonment as a child and a physically abusive previous marriage; I just wanted my body to stop hurting so much.
My body and my life continue to evolve since experiencing Rolfing. My body – the part of me I’m most aware of, I guess – is still undergoing distinct, positive transformation. I’m not willing to speculate as to what about Ms. Stolte’s Rolfing brought these incredible changes to every aspect of my being. Whatever I might suggest will most likely sound too mystical, too evangelical, too fantastical. I’d rather just say it was so.”
